In 1999 Chris Chabris and Dan Simons conducted one of the most famous experiments in modern behavioral science. It has become known simply as "The Invisible Gorilla."

Participants were shown a short video of two teams passing basketballs. One team wore white shirts, the other black. The assignment to participants was straightforward: count the number of passes made by the players in white.

Most people became intensely focused on the task.

About halfway through the video a person wearing a full gorilla suit casually walked into the middle of the players, stopped, beat their chest, and then walked off the screen. The gorilla remained in view for nearly ten seconds.

When the video ended, participants confidently reported their pass count. Then came one simple question: "Did you notice the gorilla?"

Remarkably, nearly half of the participants said no.

They weren't distracted. They weren't looking away. They weren't daydreaming. They simply never saw it.

The experiment demonstrated a key insight about the human mind: we often fail to see what is directly in front of us when our attention is focused elsewhere. That lesson extends far beyond a psychology laboratory.

The lesson for us today may be that many of us spend our days counting basketball passes, while ignoring what is really going on in our lives.

We become consumed by deadlines, emails, promotions, financial goals, social media, home projects, and the endless demands of modern life. These pursuits are often worthwhile, but they can narrow our field of vision so completely that we overlook the things that matter most.

The gorillas in our own lives rarely wear costumes. Sometimes they look like a child asking us to put down our phone. Sometimes they're a spouse quietly carrying more than their share of life's burdens. Sometimes they're an aging parent whose stories deserve one more conversation. Sometimes they're an unexpected opportunity that doesn't fit neatly into our carefully constructed plans.

And sometimes the invisible gorilla is found within ourselves.  This is something that I personally struggle with all the time.  I grew up with a Midwest work ethic – when the job is done, we just move on and look for the next job.  We don’t “put on airs”, we just take care of business and get the job done. 

What I’ve come to realize is the danger is we can become so focused on where we hope to be next year that we fail to recognize how much we've already grown. We chase the next achievement while overlooking the health we possess, the friendships we've built, the wisdom we've earned, and the countless blessings that quietly surround us every day.  For sure I support having goals, but I constantly remind my clients to count their blessings, if need be keep a journal to “see the growth” they are experiencing, and to enjoy the journey while seeking the destination.

What we give our attention to is one of life's most valuable resources because it determines what we experience.

If we continually focus on problems, we'll become experts at finding problems. If we focus on what's missing, we'll rarely appreciate what's present. But if we intentionally direct our attention toward gratitude, possibility, learning, kindness, and the people we love, those things become increasingly visible as well.

The challenge, then, is not simply to work harder or accomplish more. It is to periodically lift our eyes from counting basketball passes. To notice. To wonder. To become curious about what we've been overlooking.

A few questions to consider this week:

• What "invisible gorilla" might be standing in plain sight in your life today?
• What has captured so much of your attention that something more important may be going unnoticed?
• If you intentionally shifted your focus this week, what relationships, opportunities, or blessings might suddenly become visible?

Tony Thelen is the founder of The River Coaching and Consulting, LLC, an executive coaching firm based in West Okoboji. He is the author of "Am I Doing This Right?" and "Things We Desire." He works with CEOs, business owners, executives to remove pain, anxiety, and stress while making room for true personal and professional growth. Contact Tony at [email protected] or learn more at www.therivercoach.org