In 1960, the U.S. Olympic hockey team finished tryouts with a problem most athletes would envy: too much talent. The roster stood at 21 players, but only 20 could go to the Games. One young player was cut at the very last moment.

His name was Herb Brooks.

That team went on to win the gold medal, defeating the Soviet Union, the most dominant hockey machine on the planet at the time. Brooks watched it all from the outside. A crushing event by any measure. A door slammed shut.

Fast-forward exactly twenty years.

In 1980, a very different U.S. Olympic hockey team took the ice in Lake Placid. Young. Amateur. Overmatched. A collection of college kids facing the same Soviet juggernaut. They were older, stronger, professional, and presumed unbeatable.

And standing behind the U.S. bench as head coach?

Herb Brooks.

What followed became known as the Miracle on Ice. Against every prediction, Brooks led that improbable team past the Soviets and then past Finland to claim Olympic gold. The same man who had once been cut now inspired one of the greatest stories in sports history.

The lesson isn’t about hockey.

It’s about life.

Events happen. Sometimes unfair ones. Sometimes heartbreaking ones. Sometimes confusing ones that don’t make sense until much later, if they ever do. But events do not predict the outcome of our lives.

Our response to events does.

Some people allow events to drain them. Others allow those same events to shape, fuel, and inspire them. The difference is not talent, luck, or circumstance. The difference is whether we choose to be inspirable. Are we open to growth, energy, and purpose even when the moment itself feels defeating.

Here are five ways to focus less on the event and more on the response:

1. Name the story you’re telling yourself.
   When something happens, ask: What meaning am I assigning to this event? Most suffering comes not from the event, but from the story we attach to it. Name the story, then decide if it’s the one you want to live by.
2. Ask: “What would my best self do here?”
   Not your angriest self. Not your wounded self. Your best self. The question reframes the moment from reaction to identity. Find that calmer, wiser response waiting underneath the noise.
3. Delay your first answer.
   Whether in an email, a meeting, or a difficult conversation, resist the urge to respond immediately. Time is a powerful ally. Even a short delay turns impulse into intention.
4. Choose growth over being right.
   The need to win an argument often costs us more than we realize. In tense moments, ask: Is my goal to be right, or to grow? One hardens the moment; the other opens it up to new thinking.
5. Practice response in low-stakes moments.
   You don’t learn composure in a crisis. You can rehearse it daily. When traffic slows, when plans change, when someone disappoints you. Small moments are the training ground for life’s biggest tests.

Being inspirable doesn’t mean pretending life is easy. It means believing that even difficult chapters can supply the energy and enthusiasm to write a better next one.

Herb Brooks didn’t become great despite being cut. In many ways, he became great because he got cut, and how he responded to it.

So when the unexpected happens, and it will, remember this: the event is just a moment. Your response is the story. Controlling our response is not a gift - it’s a practiced skill. And like all skills, it’s built one small, intentional moment at a time.

Tony Thelen is the founder of The River Coaching & Consulting, LLC, where he works with CEOs and senior leaders to help them live and lead with clarity, purpose, and intention. “The River” is a weekly column focused on practical wisdom for a fulfilling life and successful career. Learn more at www.therivercoaching.com or contact him at [email protected]